I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I love you. Go after that dick
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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