no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
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Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
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Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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