They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He uses pillows to masturbate.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
