There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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