It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
