i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
