I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
