sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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