I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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