I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize
