I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
