my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize