If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
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