Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
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I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
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Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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