I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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