no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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