haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
