just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
