How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
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I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
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