I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
