you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.