my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Sex on roller skates
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.