I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
