Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
