i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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