mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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