Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
