you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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