Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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