Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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