Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
