Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
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He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
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