Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
