you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize