let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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