I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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