FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
