My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
