You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
