You're so nebulous sometimes
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Randomize
