I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
It's blow job season.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
