Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Randomize
