just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize