Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
