so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
