Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize