when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I understand Curling. That high.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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