I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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