I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
