god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
