I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize