The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
