I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
