this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
